Stephen Manderson, better known by his musical alias Professor Green, is crying on camera. He cuts an imposing figure, tattoos covering his arms and neck, dwarfing the family members he is seen on screen with. At first look, he is the typical masculine man. Yet, Manderson is now unashamedly crying as he sits in a psychiatrist office, talking about the suicide of his late father. “Why should I be scared of people seeing me like this? If they see me laugh they should be able to see me cry,” he says.
Seeing Manderson so openly vulnerable is at first shocking, but this is the point. BBC3’s Professor Green: Suicide and Me is asking us to examine this reaction and the stigma surrounding men and their ability to express emotion. Gender stereotyping and the pressures of masculinity are a real and dangerous threat, the documentary tells us – one that results in the suicide of far too many men. The biggest killer of men under 45 is not heart disease or cancer, not car accidents or drunken tragedies–it is suicide. Approximately 6,000 people each year in the UK choose to end their own life, and men make up 80% of this figure. It’s a hard statistic to swallow, and not one we like to dwell on, Manderson knows. “If you want to empty a room, you bring up suicide, don’t you?”
It’s the personal elements, and the search for answers that Manderson puts himself through that makes this documentary about the ‘silent endemic’ of suicide in men so hard-hitting and heart-breaking. Neither Manderson, nor most of his family, saw his father’s death coming. As such the documentary is calling for men to not bottle up their feelings. The impact of a loved one’s suicide is painful and long lasting. But the pain of knowing it was perhaps preventable is what haunts Manderson the most. “At the end of the day suicide is a violent end. It’s the taking of a life,” says Manderson. “It’s hard to talk about and it’s scary. Shying away from it is not going to do any good, though…. I wish he reached out to me.”
The documentary aims to help open up discussion about the prevalence of suicide in our society, and start dismantling the taboo that still unfortunately remains around the topic. Manderson even admits himself to needing someone to talk to, scheduling his own counselling session. It’s a bold and symbolic move for someone as well known as him, to allow discussion about the things he’s most guarded about. “I don’t want to appear vulnerable,” he admits, “and that’s a huge part of the problem with it.”
The message is clear – men need to be more vocal, and services need to be seen as more acceptable for men to reach out to. In short, there needs to be much more recognition of men’s mental health. Men need to know that feeling like they can’t continue living is a valid emotion, and not indicative of being less of a man. It’s a message that we’re perhaps familiar with, but as Manderson’s struggle shows, it’s a message worth repeating.
The strength of the documentary comes from Manderson’s candidness, openness and his genuine desire for a change in attitude. It’s an important and worth while watch. Professor Green: Suicide & Me is on BBC iPlayer now.
Heather Nash
Image: The BBC.