The cruel reality of 50 Shades of Grey

There’s something incredibly frightening about Fifty Shades of Grey, and it’s nothing to do with the awful new cinematic adaptation. Whilst it seems that E.L James’ novel has been softened up for the big screen, it must not be forgiven that the source material remains a story about a vulnerable young woman being taken in by a sociopathic man who systematically abuses her. Fifty Shades of Grey is not a love story, it’s a dangerous romanticisation of an abusive relationship. In reality, there is not happily ever after for victims of abuse; at best there are years of counselling and trying to rebuild their lives. At worst, they lose their lives altogether.

The ‘it’s just a novel’ defence is paraded in front of Fifty Shades repeatedly but the problem is that this simply isn’t true anymore. With the recent film adaptation inescapably filling seats in cinemas, and every major newspaper and news outlet reporting on every tiny detail of the film’s journey, it’s an unavoidable presence. The idea of a rich, powerful, overbearing significant other has become synonymous with romance, with countless women fantasizing about the scenarios described in excruciating detail  within James’ novel. This normalisation of abuse has been turned into a box office smash, mass-marketed and widely available for for anyone to consume.

In the film, Christian Grey not only controls Ana sexually, but in all aspects of her life.
In the film, Christian Grey not only controls Ana sexually, but in all aspects of her life.

The portrayal of BDSM in the film has come under fire repeatedly from members of the BDSM community, who have criticised James’ lack of insight into the reality of BDSM, particularly her understanding of dominance and submission. Christian Grey frequently abuses the trust that Anastasia Steele places in him, and for all the importance placed on the contractual agreement the pair negotiate, they never actually enter into a formal agreement about the terms of their relationship.

This normalisation of abuse has been turned into a box office smash, mass-marketed and widely available for for anyone to consume.

Trust and understanding are key to the practice of BDSM and without these it is nothing more than abuse. Furthermore, James’ novel perpetuates the dangerous stereotype that those who engage in BDSM activities do so because of some unresolved trauma from childhood; Grey was abused as a child, which is the reason he gives for his behaviour as an adult. BDSM is not something he enjoys as a consensual activity in a healthy relationship, as is the case with responsible members of the BDSM community; it is simply a means for him to vent his frustrations, which he openly admits.

Even with James’ inaccurate and offensive portrayal of BDSM, it’s not Christian’s sexual preferences that make him an abusive figure; it’s his relentless pursuit of Ana. Throughout the series he is seen stalking her (which is dismissed, joked about, as though it’s a character quirk rather than a worrying obsession), threatening her repeatedly, manipulating her into staying with him, belittling her and attempting to control her diet, spending, and even her friendships.

Even in the relatively tame film which contains a mere 20 minutes of sex out of a two hour runtime, Grey spends the majority of his time tracking down Ana and attempting to convince her to sign into a sexual contract with him. It’s worth noting that she never actually signs this contract, and within the novel, Grey admits to using alcohol in attempts to get her to bend to his will.

These are all the hallmarks of an abusive relationship but are dismissed by virtue of Grey’s wealth and charm. What cannot be ignored is that at his core, Christian Grey is a sociopath, concerned only with his own wants and desires. Ana is merely a means to an end. Whilst the final novel, ‘Fifty Shades Freed’, provides some sort of happy ending for Ana, this itself is dangerous, perpetuating the idea that abusers can somehow be ‘fixed’ by their victims, which is often what keeps abuse victims in destructive relationships in the first place; their belief that they alone can change their partner, even despite the risk to their own safety.

Trust and understanding are key to the practice of BDSM and without these it is nothing more than abuse

Finally, on the subject of the sex that Fifty Shades has been sold on; the female orgasm is the one thing that’s conspicuously absent, further highlighting how women are reduced to playthings rather than equals. Undoubtedly women should be encouraged to explore their sexuality, but there is no liberation in Fifty Shades of Grey; only oppression, and the reinforcement of the dangerous belief that women want and deserve to be dominated and controlled.

With the money you might spend on a ticket to see the film, consider instead donating to a charity which helps victims of domestic abuse; a far more worthwhile cause than lining the pockets of E.L James or the film studios who show no concern for the cruel reality of the fantasy they represent.

Hannah Woodhead 

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