Recently, I keep hearing the same type of story from friends over and over again. I hate to make a sweeping statement but there is a certain consensus in society that all girls want relationships.  There is the idea that we stare at our phones waiting for your text, analyse over whether to put one kiss or two, and get annoyed when you flirt with other girls. I’m not saying there aren’t girls that do this – I know a few that are guilty of it – but most of the time we probably have better things to do with our time.

I blame media representation. I am a big fan of chick flicks, but I can’t help but blame them for the dating dilemmas people create for themselves. People can over-analyse the smallest details, and it is just maddening. It might be a question of the chicken and the egg with who shaped the perceptions of dating, but interactions between people don’t always fit the rom-com mould.

Not everything is so black and white. Nowadays, there are a lot of grey areas. Relationships don’t always move in a linear fashion. They are not as structured as the courting culture of the past. A relationship status isn’t so clear-cut as a case of being a friend, someone you’re dating, or boyfriend/girlfriend. There is less definition in some relationships. It is so easy to be attracted to someone, but that can be all it is. It can be hard to describe to others. It doesn’t catapult from being interested to being a couple. Some people need to get this into their heads. I’m surprised that people don’t just scream, “I do not want a relationship, I just want to go to the pub!”

Personally, it takes months for me to like someone. Even if I have hooked up with someone a couple of times, it doesn’t mean anything more than that. I’m even fine, and sometimes encourage, my friends to get with boys I have. Madness, I know. It is so easy to do the ‘girly’ thing, and over think things. However, just in case some of you didn’t get the memo: girls like to be single too. It must be so frustrating when you hear that someone you have hung out with plays it off as all one-sided and claims, ‘She’s into me’. Did you not choose to take part in your interaction? And what makes you think they are not thinking the exact same as you?

I just think people need to shake off perceptions. If I reply with two kisses when normally you only get one, lucky you! No, I’m not in love. I’m probably just feeling generous that day. I don’t want your babies.