I am increasingly perturbed by the new love between the guy from downstairs and a girl from my flat. As I write this, they sit in a lovers’ embrace in front of me. Touching. Smiling. Being happy. Despite the fact that I like them both, I want to chain them to concrete and throw them to the bottom of the sea. I want their happiness to drown in a sickly ocean of romance and dreams whilst I stand alone atop a cliff of isolation, alone, but fundamentally physically unharmed.

 In other news, nobody else has bought bread this week, and I have noticed my loaf decreasing faster than I have been consuming it. I pondered setting up a Glitter-esque webcam to catch the bread thieves but I figured that fundamentally my care is not great enough to justify this. I don’t even like bread that much. On Wednesday, I cut my lip on a tin of peaches.

 Had a conversation with enthusiastic girl retaking her first year in history. I wanted to suggest a friendship somehow, like by inviting her to fly kites or go for drinks or something. How do suggest friendship? Do you have to send an invitation card? In the end we had a conversation about finishing our bibliographies (She had, I hadn’t) and whether she’d enjoyed her night in Space when I saw her. She looked disappointed and bored, which is usually a face I see after sex rather than conversation, which was novel.

 Then a little later on Friday I had the day off. Productivity died as I conquered Iberia on Rome: Total War. Still single, but also Roman Emperor. Bittersweet mix. I didn’t tidy my room. Got to the end of my very Hungry Caterpillar tissues which was quite sad, so I cut out the picture to pin to my board. Lost the picture. An ex and I had once bonded over the very hungry caterpillar, so eventually glad to have lost the picture. Thought about going for a bike ride. Didn’t.

 Punctuated all of the week with drinking. Mindless drinking. Killed so many brain cells that I would have felt at home at Leeds Met. On Tuesday, I went to Leodis (to drink) and stood in a circle of the people I’d gone there with, talking amongst ourselves but not to other people. Made a mental list of people I might want to talk to in the room, before nervously engaging one guy over the football and getting a gin-fuelled “you seem like a nice guy” from him after about ten minutes. Friend made. No need to send a card to him. Creepily asked two people in Portuguese class to be facebook friends. They added me. Two more.

 Negatives this week:

–          Cut lip on tinned peaches

–          No more hungry caterpillar tissues

–          Still single

–          Low bread levels

 

Positives this week:

–          +5 friends